The Korea Herald

소아쌤

Building a family for those without one

By Korea Herald

Published : Feb. 1, 2012 - 16:34

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Former office worker takes care of 10 young N.K. defectors at his home


Kim Tae-hoon was your average office worker at a publishing company, well on his way up the promotion ladder.

But his life turned around when he met young Yeom Ha-ryeong, a North Korean defector, during a volunteer program.

“I was volunteering for an organization where I met a lot of different children, but one day I met a child who was sort of alone, he was a fourth grader at the time,” said Kim.

“The child asked if he could sleep over at my place for just one night.”

Kim quit his job. Six years later he goes through 20 kilograms of rice a week and does at least 14 loads of laundry for 10 young North Korean defectors under his care.

Not to mention living without his own room, and running to and from school as a concerned parent.

“That one night turned into this,” said Kim, who now lives in a modest villa in Seoul, with four bedrooms and one bathroom for 11 people.

The family, as him and the boys affectionately call it, is different from others group homes.

“When other experts in the field come over to our house, they are incredibly surprised at how bright the children’s faces are,” said the 35-year-old.

“They even go so far as to ask if they are really children defectors from the North.”
Kim Tae-hoon (center, second row) and his boys pose for a family portrait. (Kim Tae-hoon) Kim Tae-hoon (center, second row) and his boys pose for a family portrait. (Kim Tae-hoon)

What the experts and Kim are referring to are the bright faces and warm smiles they all have.

And it is because Kim has strived to not only provide a house but a home and a loving family.

“At least in this home, whatever they chose to do they will be understood and welcomed,” said Kim.

“We are a family, what else would we be,” said Han Jin-bum, who will be entering his second year of middle school this March.

Kim is hoping to send a message through these kids.

“We want to show that young defectors can live happily amongst us,” he said, as his biggest burden is the prejudice they face.

“Because of that prejudice these children shrink up with their heads down.”

But because they have a family, the boys themselves begun to change by finding dreams and building confidence.

Kang Min-suk, who will be going into his third year of middle school, dreams of becoming a prosecutor and has since worked hard to improve his grades. Kang’s goal next year is to academically be within the top forty in his school.

The children set up an art show in 2010, which Kim said left many inspired, held a concert in which they performed in 2011 and plan to hold another art show this year.

But when meeting these kids, it is easy to forget that they crossed perilous rivers, and lost parents both in the North and while defecting.

Lee Jin-chul and his younger brother Lee Uk-cheol were wasting away with hunger in the North, after being long separated from their parents.

“We thought if we’re going to starve to death here, we might as well die trying to defect,” said Lee Jin-chul.

So they tied ropes around their waists and made the journey across the Duman River vowing that they would die together if they got swept away, before finally defecting into South Korea in 2010.

But now the older Lee has set his sights on going to an agriculture university and becoming a farmer, which earned him the nickname “old man.”

Han Jin-bum had grown up working for as long as he could remember in the North with no parental figure to provide for him. Han would collect firewood all day in the mountains for a bowl of rice.

Now that Han has found a family he rarely likes to leave Kim’s sight when going out.

But Kim’s decision to give these boys a family was far from easy.

“One day I was in my office looking at a report, and wondered where I would be in two years.”

And after looking at both his team leader and director, Kim realized he didn’t want to be either, so he just quit, but for Kim that was the only easy part.

Before that Kim had never lived alone, never had to worry about running a home, and knew nothing about setting up a group home.

And it didn’t help matters that he had lost the support of his family as well.

“My mother and I stopped contacting each other for two years after I told her my decision to take in the boys.”

And Kim said he used to like designer clothes, go out to drink and party with his friends, but now he is more concerned about feeding the boys and helping them build up their resume.

“I have never regretted my decision.”

Group homes stereotypically have the stigma of housing children who fail to get along, or suffer from instability because of the rotation of children.

So Kim worked very hard to raise his boys as a family, and fought like any other parent when his boys faced hardships.

The boys have been through every form of prejudice this society can dish out, from pitiful looks and name calling to group beatings and even being reported as a spy.

But they are all in the past with Kim’s family.

According to government data, as of 2010, 3,068 young North Korean defectors had made the treacherous journey out of the reclusive country.

Since 1998 the number has been steadily rising to hit an all time high of 464 defectors from six to 20-years-old that crossed the border into the South in 2009.

By Robert Lee (robert@heraldcorp.com)